I am afraid!

Well, almost every human on this planet is afraid of something or the other. Some are afraid of darkness, some are afraid of heights, some of ghosts, some of their parents, some are afraid of GOD and some are afraid of death. Yeah, I am afraid of death if no one else. I dont know why and how this creeped into my mind.... But once in a while there come a period when I cannot think of anything else. I couldnt bear the thought of loosing everything. The fear of loosing the sense of being is unsettling. I try and I try hard but cannot get my head out of it.
I couldnt sleep, something/someone wakes me up. And being a person with less friends, I dont find anything else to divert my mind on to.
I was very young when I accidentally realized how it would be when you die. It's like you are there and then you loose everything, you cannot see, cannot hear, cannot feel and worst of all you cannot think. How is it? Like when you sleep only that you wont wake up again. Its a scary thought if you think about it now. But at that moment of truth it wont be anything.
I dont want to think about it, but it comes to my mind every now and then. A slight problem in health for instance. And I keep thinking of bad and worse things to happen. It goes away after some days, depends on how easily I get involved in other things. But its never easy.
I dont know if there are others who suffer like me, what do they do about it. But would really like to know, not how they feel but how do they cope with it. I dont want to think about death, because of all I do I can never avoid it forever.
[For instance, while writing this; I kept thinking people who are going to die, generally make statements about death. Which are found after they die. I am crap. Somebody help me please :( ]

Irony of WMDs

Should only nuclear weapons be regarded as WMDs, what about the pistols, guns, which normal people carry. They are also capable of mass killings; massacre. Well its about the Virginia Tech killings that happened yesterday. And I was horrified to know that any citizen in USA can have a gun for self.
That just makes every single person vulnerable to attack. I slight depression or a small fight can do it all. And that just explains the shoot-outs that has happened in schools. And just anybody can be put to do that, given the fact depression is a widely spread symptom and people in US catch it very easily.
Irony is a nation which believes that other nations should not hold weapons for defense purposes and carries on pre-emptive wars where they only doubt of WMDs presence, allows each citizen to carry weapon for there own safety.
What kind of logic is that? And let me be a little sarcastic and ask, docent the government have faith in its PDs for the safety of the citizens?

Well politics and logic are different breeds altogether.

Reason for working late!

Well we all do that, especially the bachelors in software industry. Its not that we do a full time work staying late; we just dont know what to or where to go sometimes.
I remember one instance in Infy, I was in the office at around 11:30 PM. I had just finished my work for the day and was surfing for something and my manager came in.
He called me from behind and said, " There is a place called home, Soumya." I wondered whether he was being sarcastic or being considerate. Nevertheless I replied, "Well, I call it a room. And it doesn't sound as appealing as a home(smile)."

I think we both understood. I hoped he could give me a transfer to my home town.